AREA MAN UPDATES BLOG

After three months of no updates, local resident Joe T. posted a new topic on his widely-ignored blog site. Citing "frustration with the written word and the English language," Mr. T. reassured the press that there would be more new entries within the coming weeks; "We are working through some logistical issues regarding punctuation and then there's the old debate over what really constitutes a topic of general interest, or of any interest."

With a short history of being one of the most universally unknown blogs on the internet, productivCitizen is not read by over 99.9% of US citizens on a daily basis. Across the rest of the world, the actual numbers are closer to 100%, according to available market research.

"There's no guarantee that anyone will want to look at our stupid boring pictures, or read the half-baked wet cardboard that our editors approve, but we're gonna keep doing it anyway," Said Mr. T.